She found a position as a matchmaker through a newspaper ad. The profession has a long history in Chinese culture. But today' s dating services emphasize efficiency and personal choice, while traditional matchmakers focused on pairing families of equal social status, plus analyzing the partners' birthdates and other qualities. Although many modern matchmaking clubs use computers and videotaped screenings, the Taichung branch of the Yi Hsin (Pleasant Heart) Club is rather low tech, still relying on the staff to pair up couples from among the files of club members.
Yang, 24, has, been on the job for two years and earns NT$35,000 [US$1,300] a month. In college, she earned extra cash tutoring elementary school students in math, Chinese, and English, but much of her earnings, and some of her parents' money, went toward frequent trips overseas. Yang has visited the United States, Europe, and several Asian countries. Since she started work, she has limited herself to occasional visits to see her boyfriend in Japan.
Actually, I got into this profession accidentally. I didn't know this was a matchmaking club when I applied.The ad said the club was in the recreation and communications industry, so I thought it had something to do with mass communications or public relations. Anyway, I decided to stay after I found out what it was. I'm interested in this job because I'm interested in people. I get to talk to different kinds of people and introduce strangers who might get married because of my introduction.
Our work is really not very complicated: we match up the club members. Our work hours are from ten in the morning to eight or nine in the evening. I don't really mind the long hours. I guess it's because I spent too much time playing when I was a student. I used to travel a lot in college—at least three or four times a year—so I think I should spend more time working now.
Answering phone calls from people who see our ads is an important part of the job. Many people think they kind of lose face if they have to meet people through a matchmaking club. We have to convince them over the phone that this is a healthy way to meet people so they'll be willing to come and talk. In between incoming phone calls, we call our members to arrange dates for them. And we give detailed information on their prospective partners—age, height, occupation, education, and family background, and perhaps religion if the member wants to know.
Another important part is interviewing people who are interested in becoming members. Talking face-to-face is very important. I observe people and ask for detailed background information. It's meaningless to tell these people how successful our club has been or what a good reputation we have. It's whether we can find a match for this particular person that counts. So we spend a lot of time on this interview. The more we understand the member, the better chance we have of finding them a perfect match.
In these face-to-face meetings, we also try to get a clear idea of what kind of partner the person wants to meet. Different people have different criteria, but there are some basics such as age, height, and education. Naturally, the younger a member is, the more he or she demands. Male members ask for someone young and good looking, female members ask for financial stability. Some people's demands are so specific that they even ask for a certain blood type or zodiac sign. But it seems like many people don't understand that the more they demand, the fewer chances they have. I don't mean they should forget all their terms and marry just anyone introduced to them. Actually, we don't think love at first sight happens every day. So we suggest that our members have an open mind and try to meet different people, including people who may not be exactly the type of person they asked for.
Some of our members are young, good looking, or rich—I mean the type of person who could easily find a boyfriend or girlfriend. They come here because they can have more choices, or because they can't meet the kind of person they want in their social circles. Generally, younger women have better chances, but it's not so for men. Most men over thirty-five have already made certain achievements in their careers and can offer financial stability. Like I said, most people who come to us are very practical. The more they have to offer, the more they ask for.
As soon as someone decides to join our club, we work fast. Sometimes we arrange dates the day after they become a member. The first date has to be in our office. We have a small cafeteria with little rooms where they can chat. It's safer this way and avoids a lot of trouble such as who should pay if they meet at a restaurant. Some people find their ideal match right away and get married within a few months. But in some cases, we've arranged twenty or thirty meetings with no results. Basically, once you become a member, we're responsible for introducing people to you until you get married. We can't complain about this. We try to match people up, but we can't force anyone to like another person.
There are also some members who we consider troublesome. The kind I dislike most are those who ask a lot without considering their own conditions. Some young men ask that their dates own an apartment and a car. You know the saying: "Marrying a rich woman saves a man twenty years of hard work." There are also people who ask for impossible things. For example, one guy brought in a lot of comic strips and wanted us to find him a girl like the ones in the comics. He looked so serious, we didn't know whether we should laugh or what.
Matchmaking is an old profession. We're just doing it more systematically and efficiently. The biggest difference between us and traditional matchmakers is the pressure. In traditional matchmaking, the first time the two parties meet there are a lot of other important people there—parents, relatives, friends. The couple may feel a lot of pressure. But there's no pressure here. In the old days, however, matchmakers were highly respected. But the relationship we have with our members is much more practical. Basically, we're just a bridge people can use to meet other people. The bridge is not so important once you've reached the other bank. So most of them don't tell us even if they get married through our introduction.
But we feel a sense of achievement if we know that one of our couples gets married. And because we're doing things carefully and sincerely, our club has established a certain reputation in this profession. We require that our members be at least high-school graduates. Many of them are doctors, lawyers, or professors. A problem we often encounter is that people think it's embarrassing to let their friends or colleagues know they're joining a matchmaking club. I always explain to these people that professional matchmakers exist because society has this need. And the information here is strictly confidential, so there is nothing to worry about.
Some people think I'm too young to be a matchmaker. They don't say anything directly, but you can see from their eyes that they have doubts: "You're so young, and you're single. What could you possibly know about matchmaking?" I don't blame them. But if they ask, I tell them that I've been a professional matchmaker for more than two years, so I do know how to match people. And I have a steady boyfriend. My boyfriend is in Japan studying architecture. We plan to get married in three or four years. If he decides to stay there, I think I'll quit my job and join him there, so I'm taking some Japanese lessons now. We talk on the phone almost every day. My phone bill is my biggest expense. Other than that, living in Taichung is less expensive than in Taipei [where her parents and younger brother live]. I guess one of the reasons is that there aren't too many places to shop here.
—interview by Jim Hwang