Taipei Municipal Fuxing Senior High School now allows students to wear the school uniform of their choice—female or male—whatever the gender others assign to them.
“Xiao Ru,” a Fuxing student, was assigned male sex at birth, but has been fond of dressing up like a girl since she was a child, and loathed her male body and voice, and the male-sounding name she was given.
Slender, with long blonde-dyed hair, Xiao Ru normally wears Japanese-inspired Gothic Lolita wear, and carries a cell phone, makeup case and a mirror. Everything is in her favorite color, pink. However, in the past, she had to dress up as a male during school hours, and was only able to dress as herself after hours.
Fuxing principal Lu Feng-mou said Xiao Ru happened to enter the school the year after the decision was made to put boys and girls in separate classes. Placed in a boys’ class due to her male appearance, Xiao Ru’s bearing and temperament were more female. She applied to quit school in the second year, and her parents and the school both thought that it was because she was not adjusting well to the academic environment.
Finally, Xiao Ru got up the courage to talk about her gender identity issues and requested a girl’s uniform and the right to wear it. After a series of discussions, the school eventually responded positively and allowed students to make their own choice as to uniform.
Three years ago Xiao Ru had already appeared at school one day in a girl’s uniform, after she noticed that the school regulations only say that students must wear uniforms, without specifying male or female. There was a huge uproar on campus. Aside from the teachers’ reaction, students she did not even know called her ugly names, making her reluctant to remain on campus.
But today, she can openly wear female clothing. “This is how things should have always been, only a few years late!” she said.
Xiao Ru said that when she was a child, she never understood why boys could not wear pretty pink skirts, but had to wear ugly blue uniforms instead. She also felt that the boys’ bathroom with its row of urinals was awful. But at that time, she knew nothing about gender identity. She only knew that “people who are different get laughed at.”
When Xiao Ru entered middle school, she found that she was most enjoyed talking to girls, but did not have romantic feelings towards them. This helped her understand her own inclinations, but because she was born the only son in the family, and did not want to disappoint her parents, she chose to continue playing the role the adults in her world expected of her.
In high school, when the girls and boys were scheduled for classes separately, she was “in hell,” she said. Whether it was swim class with everyone in bathing suits, or changing clothes after gym class in the locker room, she felt uncomfortable. In classes, she would hide in the corner, waiting for the bell to ring.
Last year, when Xiao Ru went back to school, her female uniform still occasionally incurred some teasing and strange looks. Some teachers still felt that he should not be dressing up. But after the initial wave of reaction, things went back to normal. Although she still gets some looks while walking around campus, she knows that there is just no way to change some people’s attitudes, and there is still a long path ahead of her, so she will just need to work even harder.
Huang Shi-ya, a senior in the drama class, said everyone has something they want most to be, and other people have no right to interfere in that. She applauds Xiao Ru’s courage. Cui Yong-xuan, a junior, said it is very difficult to have been born the wrong gender, and she supports the decision on the school’s part to be more open.
Xiao Ru will take the college entrance examination this year. She hopes to work as a clothing designer or in special effects makeup later. Her greatest dream is to be able to change her name and undergo surgical procedures for gender change, looking ahead to a rebirth and being able to live a life comfortable with what she is.
(This article originally appeared in The Liberty Times Jan. 24.)