The first "Friendship Force" group, 54 American men and women, came from Harrisburg, Pennsylvania; the second, 76 persons, from Richmond, Virginia.
According to Don Steenburgh, leader of the second team, Friendship Force is an Atlanta, Georgia-based international organization aimed at promoting world peace and harmony through friendship. Steenburgh, handing me his name card, pointed out two lines of fine lettering in its upper right hand corner—" A world of friends means a world of peace." Originated in 1977 by Dr. Wayne Smith, a minister, the Friendship Force now involves 200,000 people from 85 countries on five continents, according to Steenburgh.
People who visit other countries as "ambassadors" of the Force pay their own expenses, but they are specially honored, being received by local residents in their homes. Believing that prejudice and discord among people of different backgrounds arise mostly from misunderstanding, the Force asks its "ambassadors" to be open-minded, willing to learn from others-which is the significant qualification for anyone who wishes to join the program.
We decided to see how the group's visit was working out by paying a visit to one of the host families. I rang the bell; Mr. Cheng came to answer the door. As I was removing my shoes to put on the house slippers, explosive laughter rang in the room. It was 8 p.m., and hosts and guests were still at their dinner. While I was hesitating about the propriety of joining them, a friendly older American lady and her daughter were saying hello to me— "I am Skip," and "I am Anne." And I couldn't resist their evident warmth.
I admired their dexterous use of chopsticks. Anne responded: "When we first came here, we thought it would be a good way to go on a diet. Now, look at the table of dishes Mrs. Cheng has made, and you can see she is a good cook. And Mr. Cheng has been a good teacher, showing us how to use chopsticks. So I am putting on weight instead."
Mrs. Cheng can neither speak nor understand English, but her smiles speak loudly. She said, in Chinese, with maternal pride: "Anne loves fish." Anne caught her meaning, apparently as a result of previous "conversation," and replied: "Oh yes. The other day, we visited the National Palace Museum, and they told us that the fish is a good symbol: fish will guarantee that you will have the next meal. And as a singer, I am very superstitious."
There was a burst of laughter, and Anne's mother, Skip, commented: "This is a happy family. The family members are so close. And the children respect their parents."
When I asked if Skip and her daughter could speak any Mandarin, they both nodded their heads. "Of course. Bull (no), mei li (pretty), hsieh hsieh (thank you), gan bei (a toast- 'bottoms up'), ni hao ma (how are you), or ma ni hao (hello, mother)." Their English-scented Mandarin triggered another flood of laughter.
They could even use their chopsticks to form Chinese numerals. A single horizontal chopstick for the number one, two parallel horizontal chopsticks for two, and an additional parallel chopstick for three. And they put two chopsticks under their nostrils like a moustache to signify eight. Crossed chopsticks became ten.
Litchis in the shell—A new experience for Skip and Anne
This was Anne's first trip as a Friendship Force ambassador, though she has traveled a lot as a singer. "On one concert tour, I visited seven countries in 21 days. Sometimes we stayed at people's homes. I have no difficulty in adjusting," she asserted.
It was the second time the Chengs had hosted such ambassadors from the States. "Last time, we hosted an American lady. I was so sorry, since I can 't speak English, that I couldn't communicate with her. This time I determined to receive two guests, if possible, so even if they couldn't speak to me, they would be able to talk to each other. And so here they are," said Mrs. Cheng.
For the Abernathys, however, the language is never a barrier. "You can tell from the facial expressions," Anne said. "Jane (Mrs. Cheng) always uses her hands, and that helps too. And though you don't quite understand it, the sound of the language is beautiful. The family's friends keep coming and going, and it seems that you make friends with them in five minutes." She went on:
"Now, we have learned to take off our shoes before we enter a home, and put on house slippers. When we encounter a strange Chinese food, we pretend it is meat, because that is what people will tell you when you inquire. We have learned to love Chinese shou hsin wine, and when responding to toasts, to lift our cups with two hands. We love the gorgeous Peking opera costumes we saw at Fushing Opera School several days ago. And a lot more."
At this juncture, Jane's daughter, May Cheng, treated us to a dish of pineapple cubes and litchi. Skip was interested in the litchi and asked me how to eat it. To tease her, I said: "Why, just eat it." I turned my head to place the dish of pineapple on a table, but Skip was so quick that she really bit into the litchi, skin and all, before I could stop her. The skin has a horrible taste. Fortunately, she spit it out in time.
Anne, demonstrating her new prowess with the chopsticks
The Abernathys said May had agreed to visit them in August as a member of a Friendship Force from the Republic of China. "This is what you call a people-to-people exchange. I remember when we first came here, we didn't know what to expect. We were somewhat apprehensive, scared. After all, you don't know who you are going to meet, where you are going to stay. The only thing you know is that they must be friendly, otherwise they wouldn't have volunteered to be hosts. Mr. Cheng and my father are both retired air force veterans, so we have a lot in common. Also, we are all open to new and strange things and interested in meeting new situations and new people," Anne commented.
We, also, had a good time at the Chengs, staying on until 10:30 p.m., when most street shops had already called it a day. On the way home, an unexpected downpour soaked our clothes, and I suddenly recalled a story told about Josephine Langdon, a school teacher with the first Friendship Force.
For her, the conservative Chinese way of expressing emotions was of great interest: "I've never seen Chinese people exchanging kisses or hugging. But it doesn't mean that they don't care for each other." Once she asked a daughter of her host family how she showed affection. The girl replied, "We speak with our eyes and smile." The 61-year-old American teacher commented: "That means something to me. Sometimes we are too flamboyant in our expression."
The various cultural differences between the two countries do not inhibit friendships between the two peoples. When American guests really understood the way Chinese think and act, what might initially seem incredible or even funny may well, later, become reasonable, worthy of appreciation-and vice versa. Without the barrier of hard misunderstanding, sincere friendships grow naturally.
Mr. and Mrs. Steenburgh have travelled to Costa Rica, Germany, England, Australia—and now the Republic of China—as ambassadors of the Friendship Force. "The more friends you make, the less enemies around. One person can make the difference," Don Steenburgh said.
We visited Steenburgh at the residence of Richard C. Y. Tsou, secretary general to the Taipei City Council. The team leader popped a letter from his pocket, a greeting for the people of the Republic of China from President Ronald Reagan. He read the letter to me:
"My long-standing personal friendship and deep concern for the people of Taiwan is steadfast and unchanged. I am committed to maintaining the full-range of contacts between the people of the United States and people of Taiwan. Such contacts will continue to grow and prosper, and will be conducted with the dignity and honor befitting old friends."
Dr. Jeanne Tchong Koei Li, president of the Pacific Cultural Foundation, co-sponsor of the Force activities here, announced that aside from bringing good will to the Chinese people, the group was also ready to share their experiences in Taiwan with the people of their hometown. With their introduction of the ROC, the friendly ties between the U.S. and this country are sure to be benefitted.